The value of nothingness....

I am on a break...not a sabbatical but just a week long break and one question i keep getting by everyone is so, where r u going, why not take a vacation, why not go home, etc etc. I too initially wanted to indulge in all of these but then i refrained myself and i just stayed at my apartment, not doing anything and from my experience in the last two days, all i can say is nothingness has its own value. In the normal course life is very hectic. Getting up and just running here and there just makes you completely drained by the end of the week and no sonner you realise that, you are already hitting Sunday evening and the race begins again and in the background of all these, this break seems amazing. Last two days, frankly I have done nothing. I wake up leasurely, make my tea, aaram se read the newspaper, prepare my breakfast, ask the maid to make a nice lunch, relax again, watch tv, read a book, go for a brisk walk and just laze around. Thankfully, my house comp is also not working and hence that ensures i dont spend all my time sticking my neck on the screen. Life is very slow and the lack of pace really lets me unwind. I could have gone somewhere but there is value in being with just yourself, all alone for the whole day, no one around and you being able to just gaze into the thin air for sometime more, roll here and then on the couch for sometime extra and stretch ur legs a bit more....there is value in all of these; there is immense pleasure in sleeping without thinking about the meetings the following day; there is immense pleasure in waking up, gazing at the watch and not saying, damn i am getting late...better still, there is immense pleasure in waking up and not feeling the need to gaze at the watch at all.... No wonder the elders talked so much about stopping to smell the roses...Nothingness has its own virtue.....

Colleagues and Friends...

I remember once way back in 1999 when I was in Bangalore and a colleague’s uncle had introduced me to some other people, “Meet Sandeep; he is a colleague of Ramesh.” That day I felt very bad. How could he use the cold word colleague when I actually thought we were good friends? A lot of water has passed under the bridge in the last (almost) decade and I have changed a lot. Today I don’t mind using the word colleague or even a colder one-acquaintance if I find that suitable. Anyways, let us come to the main topic. Is it a good idea to make friends in office or not? I of late have started feeling that it’s not such a great idea to have close friends in office. I feel very strange saying so because both my very good friends are the ones whom I had met during internship; so office has given me my so to say emotional anchors. But those were the days when there was hardly any competition among us, much less back stabbing and politics but today the scenario is very different. Everyone seems to have an agenda, right from licking someone to proving one’s superiority/smartness to passing the buck; there is no dearth of reason why someone out there is always ready to take you for a ride. However it is not easy to remain cold and extremely formal in office. Come on, you spend anything upward of 50-60 hours in office every week. You better enjoy the company over there. Consulting is every worse. You literally spend complete weeks with them when you are out on client assignments hence colleagues are more like friends; you work, you have fun, you share and you even sit by each other and care like a close pal (Senior, if you are reading this, you know what I am referring to) and hence it’s very important to send the right vibes and be friends with your colleagues. However things are not that rosy always. Fact remains that at the end of the day, everyone is here for a purpose and hence there are clashes and conflicts. Worse still, if people are by nature nasty they will hurt you even there doesn’t exist any reason for the same. There’s deceit, there’s camouflage, there’s double standardism, and there is every possible vice that exists in the world present in offices. Balancing all of these calls for a lot of maturity. On one hand you can either be either someone absolutely cold and aloof and on the other you could end up baring your ass for anyone to screw. It’s a tough call. At the end of the day, I still don’t know what is the right path? All I can say is that caution is the key; be friendly but not overtly and don’t spill all your beans to everyone. Be sure they are genuine and never forget that friends also have friends. For the rest, there is nothing which bars from having a good time together, talking some general or work related stuff, being friendly but still having zero expectations and not saying/doing anything that might tomorrow put you in a tight spot.