Between boys and girls...

Mast life hoti hai...Last night i was talking to a friend of mine and we were planning to take a vacation together. However, neither of us felt comfortable with just the two of us going, cause it would look like a date which obviously it wasnt and now the search begins for a third person, failing which all our plans would go for a toss.. Kya sad case hai; had it been a guy and such a close pal, this situation would never have come...but since its the opposite gender in question, sochna padta hai... In this case it was very frank, mature talk but if you are not a part of a larger group and get along very well, at times it becomes an issue, what will she think, would she read too much into my behaviour etc etc...The situation gets largely ameliorated if atleast one of the persons in question is committed to someone else or if there is a larger group between the two but if neither of this exist, potential for a problem does exist , something very close to... self-fulfilling prophecies For me i can tell that some of my good friends are from the opposite gender and it feels sad when despite things being so platonic, at times u have to make changes eg: chances of ditching this vacation plan just because of our stupid thoughts or our concern of what others would be thinking.... I personally believe that any external party can never tell what type of relationship exists between a guy and a girl. They might be spending hell lot of time together, might be seen together everywhere but that doesnt mean they are having a scene or something and equally possible, they might rarely be together but there could a lot happening...There is this clear line of demarcation, which manifests itself in the basic air which engulfs when u meet which tells the difference and this line is absolutely invisible to another person....Only the people concerned can tell. Proximity, friendship, affection, regard, care....none of them tantamounts to Cupid striking...Its a different ball game all together...

Letting u down...

Life is full of expectations. There are a lot of things parents expect from their children, there are a lot of things our friends expects out of us and at large, there are societal and other expectations but what we cannot help is not meetings those expectations and letting down others. I remember as a kid when at times I used to be really naughty, I would be shit scared of what Mom will tell, “How can u do this” and this emphasis of YOU on what was made me feel bad more and more. A lot has happened since those days of childish fun but even today letting down anyone is as painful as ever. It hurts to see people your own feel sad because of the things u do. I remember going to visit a friend in the hospital who had a bad drunken driving accident. That look on his mom’s face could tell a lot. She didn’t know whether to sympathize with her child or be angry with him. He had simply let her down. Another case I can distinctly remember is a friend who was asked to repeat a year because he was caught cheating. I remember the look on his Dad’s face..it said a lot. I am in no way defending these acts of these people but let us step back and analyze it a bit. Do we always look at the fallouts of our actions when we indulge in things which we ideally should not. Think about it; how many of us actually think before having a drink that we will have to drive back; how many of us actually think before putting that piece of red meat in our mouth that its extremely high on cholesterol; how many of us really bother. When we do what we shouldn’t, we are simply being cool and when we have to face the consequences, we had simply been idiots (as per the same set of people who had called us cool) This brings us to another point- Why do we do what we are not supposed to do? A lot of it depends on the circle we move in, our will-power, our tastes, preferences etc. Let us look into one aspect-will-power. Will-power or the lack of it essentially is nothing but a reflection of the strength of our character which again is based on so many other things. For those who would have seen “Gandhi, My Father” it’s a classic case of a person’s lack of strength. It is easy to say that he let down his father and that he had absolutely no strength of character but has anyone thought, what made him do that? That brings to us to the classic case of cause Vs symptom. His lack of strength was a symptom which was drawn because of the frustration in his early years due to lack of love, lack of opportunities or simply, lack of emotional anchoring. Emotional detachment and aloofness can be disastrous and if your thoughts are always engulfed by these, nothing in the world can make you successful or happy. Returning to the main topic, letting someone down; how do we cope with the situation when we have let down someone? I mean in an ideal scenario, we shouldn’t do anything that would call for a situation like this but when we have done it there is no way we can undo the harm, what should we do. In my opinion the best way is to face it upfront. Many a times postponing a problem only aggravates it. It requires immense guts to stand up and say something unpleasant but a fact in front of someone you love but think of it, cheating and deceit are worse pains to conflict on your loved ones than facing the unpleasant truth. Further, if you are hiding something, chances are very high that you are distancing yourself from your loved ones as well. However its not that easy; if you require guts to speak, the other person also requires guts to listen and that presence of maturity across both the parties might simply not be present. What do you do in that….Well, I wish I knew!!!!

Ten Videos I love....

Return to Innocence (Enigma)- I guess this was the first video which started this trend of showing everything in a rewind mode and this video is really good; almost perfect for watching when you are waiting for that stressful meeting to start and want to soothe a bit. Du Hast (Ramstein)- I cant make a word of what it says (the song is German) but the video is simply amazing, the gangster, his babe, the deceit, the beats, the look on the face of his babe waiting for him, and literally crying after seeing the flames, etc etc…the song is worth a watch especially when you are having a party at home… Iris-(OST-City of Angels)- there is something about the lyrics, something about the overall ambiance, the gazing through the telescope, the grayish black and white setting, the video is worth watching anytime and not to forget the presence of Meg Ryan in it. Time of my life (OST-Dirty Dancing) Fun, joy, love, revelry, this song seems to me the inspiration for so many of our songs and videos. The stage performance, the jump in the crowd, the whole suede crowd turning into dancing, this video has that real feel good factor associated with it and its always fun watching it. Feel-(Robbie Williams)- this video has that awesome quality of being completely laid back and its monochrome look only adds to the beauty. And the way Daryll Hannah looks in the video; stunning with her temptress looks; much better than she did in her heydays (remember: Wall Street) Wicked Game (Chris Isaac)- How could I forget this song. Voted as the sexiest video ever, this pure black and white beachside video has this topless lady running on the beach and the groovy voice of Chris Isaac following her; pretty explicitly this video is but I wont say its cheap or vulgar; its beautiful and its sensual. November Rain-(Guns n Roses)- well, the fact that this was voted as one of the best videos ever speaks volumes. The scene outside the church courtyard where Slash performs solo, his walk down the aisle, the video is almost like a whole story in motion and also not to forget the characterization in the video which is supposedly inspired from their real life love. Everybody Hurts (REM)- A stunning piece of art I would say is this video; people struck in a traffic jam and thinking all about sadness, deceit, pain etc etc…different people, different scenarios, different languages, (with subtitles) but all thinking of pain…this video is a must watch. Turn the Page (Metallica)- Pure anguish, pure pain, disgust and rebellion; that’s what I feel about this video. The way the song talks of the life of a rock star and the video talks of the life of a prostitute cum stripper, its absolutely heartfelt. You should see that shot in which the prostitute is beaten up by her customer and her daughter is staring at her from the door, plus her monologue in the middle of the song..this song and more so its video is something; of course if you can look beyond the strip scenes and the nudity. PULSE (Pink Floyd)- Nothing absolutely nothing compares to this compilation of pure psychedelic rock, David Gilmour and the background visuals. I don’t think music can ever produce something like this again. What is really amazing about this is that just play it on and you can spend a whole lazy weekend afternoon watching this.