Should there be a reason....

Of late I have had some very interesting discussions with some equally interesting people and one of the most intriguing one I have had is with this colleague of mine regarding the omnipresence or lack of it of reason and rationale. A lot of us try to find reason into things and when we cannot possibly reason it out, we label it as the Acts of God. Ages ago when people could not understand eclipses, they conveniently put it on Rahu and Ketu but do we hear such things today; possibly not and the reason being that it has now being scientifically explained. Anyways, lets not get into a tangent…. Lets talk about our state of being. Some of us are so happy and some of us are so fucked up. Life is so unfair for some of us, whatever we do, we lose. A candy comes from somewhere, it is even unwrapped and presented to you on a nice platter, and the moment u stick your tongue out, being the TD (total dick- a term commonly used in consulting) you are, you end up messing it up and tumbling the candy down-gone, vanished. And then you think why the damn should I be so fucked up. When you cannot find a reason for the same, you get into the theory of reincarnation and start explaining it from your previous birth’s wrongdoings or God’s way of testing you so that tomorrow life could be better and that tomorrow could well extend across births. But think about it, what if there was no reason for there being a reason. Things are as they are. Period. There is no Why to it. I mean things would have been so much simpler. A is fucked and B is happy and that’s their steady state of being. Simple. There is no reason for the same. Accept it. This would make life so simple and take away so many hurtful prayers…Why do someone speed up once and gets crashed in an accident, why do someone die just like that, why do someone fuck up and then cannot believe he fucked up. None of these would exist if we start believing that there is no need for everything to be explained or reasoned out. Lets look into one more last example (feeling damn sleepy…its 4AM). Nature. Why has nature always been two steps ahead of mankind? Nature slaps mankind with diseases and man conquers that and with that comes the feeling of supremacy. But hold on, its not over yet. Suddenly you find there is something else which has surfaced and is a pain. Man has cured so many deadly diseases: Plague, malaria, pox, measles, cancer, TB but think about it, it’s so interesting to know each new disease came when man had conquered the previous one. Currently there is a lot of talk about developed stages of cancer and AIDS. And I am of the firm believer that within a few years of it becoming curable, there would be some new disease. Nature is always ahead. Why is that so?? You wonder. But think about it if you start believing that either there is no reason for nature being two steps ahead or even better, nature was always like that but earlier science wasn’t advanced to detect these diseases, our grey cells would be so much at peace. Now, I think that it’s not really that easy. It is very convenient to accept the facts without trying to reason it out, either through science or God. However, there is a catch. A lot of the reasons we are not able to find, we place it on God and think about it, the moment these questions are gone, our faith and believes will also reduce considerably. And remember that line from Enigma…If you believe in God, its because of the Devil….just think about it, how much of this prevents us from misdeeds. Where would society and we go without the element of fear of God, of Him watching us.

Relationships

By far one of the most complicated and intriguing subjects-relationships. You don’t know whom you will gel with, whom you will get along with, who will come close to you, which one moment will define all throughout your life how you look at a certain person….all these and many more form an integral part of these really hazy bridge across people called relationships. Some of these relationships fall under the ambit of easily defined and understood words like family, friends etc but there are some which fit in none of these conventional terms but still are very important. Equally perplexing (and at times disturbing as well) is the thought that what makes us close to someone and what is that which prevents that from happening when you know that it should be so. If I talk of myself, I get along with a few people well and at times when I look into some of them, I don’t know under what term will that fit or even more perplexing, why is that so. Generally people tend to use the word friendship as an all-encompassing, residual term for all forms of relationships. Right from acquaintances to colleagues to people we eye, friendship is often a very umbrella word used. If it’s not family and we are close, it’s a friend. Period! I however have strong views on this. There are some relationships which are beyond the definitions of any of these conventionally understood terms; let’s leave it like that. Let me give you two personal examples; one person who has made a lot of difference in my life and I think is pretty close to me is a guy who is something like 10 years elder to me, is a very senior person and my first interaction with him was a brief 30 mins where me (totally ignorant about his status) went on bullshitting about so many damn things under the sun. That’s it but then he went ahead (without any second interaction after the first one mentioned) and referred me to a job when I needed it, helped me in my career decisions and even today whenever we can, we do catch up for some beer/coffee. Another example is there is this person with whom I feel extremely comfortable but guess what, we have never met and know each other only for some time. Some things are really weird. Equally weird is the picture on the other end of the spectrum. There are some people who we know really care for us, really are genuine people but somehow despite all this regard for them, we just can’t get along with them. There is something which stops us from sending the right vibes and you know it’s not right but then you just can’t do anything with it. Weird… One more aspect which I think deserves attention is how one moment at times is so defining that forever we judge the person because of that moment alone, irrespective of what they do, how they behave with us in present times. I remember once, way back in 1999 there was this friend of mine who said to me on phone, ”Good you screamed on me, at least you are feeling better now”. Even today when I think of her, it’s this moment which defines how I treat her. And over and above is the whole issue of this man-woman relationship. Let’s not even get into this. Then there is something else. For people who are away from that emotional anchor being provided by family, friends attain a very important position. I mean they are the ones you go back to at the end of the day whenever you want someone around. And think of it, some people have no regard for it. I remember once (unfortunately) I had to rush a friend of mine to the hospital and there the admin was unwilling to accept the word friend under the column relationship with the patient. For them, there was simply nothing tangible called friendship. Some things indeed are beyond the realms of our comprehension….