Leaving the Desert Land..

13th April, 2005 8:00 PM (Saudi Time): Sitting in the Departure Lounge Right now I m sitting in the Jeddah Duty Free, waiting for the departure of the flight which will take me to India…and more than that, take me away from Saudi. Let me tell u, till the time the exit stamp was put on my passport, I was literally shitting in my pants…no particular reason but there is some unknown fear at the back of your mind which engulfs you while you are in this country. There is no one reason which can be called the determining factor, but there is something, which makes u very very scared and post my last incident here, trust me, standing in the queue for the immigration exit wasn’t the most comfortable of feelings. Just before seating myself in a corner seat, I was seating somewhere in the middle of the café in the departure lounge and what a sight it was…four hot females…(hot females…or even females…my eyes are starved!!.)….think Lebanese….tanned skin…and their looks …ah!!! As Bryan Adams would have put it …“ with those undress me eyes” in their body hugging tops and wraps, cigarettes on their lips. U smell nicotine but u also smell something else …maybe freedom…ah..not yet…still an hour to board the flight…maybe anticipation of freedom..maybe anticipation of seeing ur family soon…of meeting your friends.. of having beer going down your throat …the anticipation of that burb…there’s so much to anticipate… But that has to wait….wait for another hour or so…wait for the departure call…wait for me to get in the flight…wait for it to take off…wait to cross the Saudi airspace and finally wait for the flight to land at Delhi and me walk out of the airport, rove my eyes to see Jiju….wave at him and if sis aint there, light a cigarette… Just a night more dude….its coming …TOUCHWOOD…there is no goof up yet again…Till that time let me turn my eyes to see those babies again.. Damn!!! they are gone.. 14th April, 2005 02:05 AM (Indian Time): In the Flight So here I am on Flight No AI 890 to Delhi, still in saudi space but on my way home…on my way to India..on my way to my own country…on my way to friends…to family…to the joi-de-vivre and not just survival….BTW thanks to Air India for upgrading me to Business Class..making it comfortable enough for me to sit and write.. The steward just told me that it’s a cool 45 minutes before we cross the Saudi airspace..hence me thought, lets write something....The last two months that I have stayed in Jeddah have made me think on a lot of issues..Life here was tough…despite the material comforts being much better…True, cars touched 100 kmph regularly, true, the level of food hygiene was very high, true the law and order situation was much better than India, true the traffic jams were much fewer….everything true but even then the heart yearned to go back home…cause the biggest of them all FREEDOM wasn’t there…There was always this feeling at the back of your mind that you are an alien here, this is not your place, you do not belong here, anything might happen…if not anything else, the very fact that you needed to carry your passport every time indicated that you are just a number, you don’t have any identity without it…it all boils down to belonging and freedom and think about it, how casually we take freedom back home. Anyway, life in Saudi was more than just missing freedom; it was also missing the small things in life. To start off with, was the complete lack of friends and family. True, my colleagues were good (sorry Rajit, for fighting so much with you), but fact remains that I never had the luxury of calling anyone from my vast group of friends…Amit, Pattu, Saurabh, Kanods, Pasha, GJ, Jo, Punda, Pats, Aditya, etc etc and saying, “Oye kya kar raha hai…chal milte hain” I missed it like hell, more than missing going out, I bloody missed the option of going out…where do u go here..Malls, Malls n more Malls….n there also you keep your senses bloody awake, least u misbehave or do something which is not what is expected of u in this country… Then there were weekends…probably the most moron weekends I have had, have been in the last 2 months…Shit man…weekend doesn’t mean spending hours in front of the TV watching Mr. Himesh Reshamiya or some semi-nude female gyrating to some obscene remix… Another thing I really missed was obviously my weekend beer…As Nanga Baba told me in the car one day…Its not the drink, it not having the option of having a drink which hurts more…How true… I can go on and on…how things were…how we have just survived but then it’s all an experience…if not anything else, I can tell anyone… Look, I have spend two months in Saudi Arabia…. I can manage anywhere!!!! Hey, the steward is asking for drinks..and guess what I am having…Single Malt..just the perfect drink to raise a toast to Life..!!!!

Mere ghar ke neeche kuan kyon nahin hai???

I aint a car fanatic and if i pit myself against two of my collegues with me here in Jeddah, Pranav and Rajit, I am not even peanuts...but then around two months with them have made me knowledgeble enough to atleast not confuse between a sedan and a SUV and also know some names u shld salivate looking at. But what do u do when u see a dozen such sleek machines in a span of 15 minutes on the road at a time when u r discussing wether u shld buy an Alto or continue travelling in auto for some more time?? Last nite, we were sitting in Starbucks...so far so good...we get down the cabbie and guess whats the car standing next..A yellow Ford Mustang...thik hai dikh gaya..big deal...everyday u see some or the other swanky car here... The real drama started when we just entered the cafe...n look, which car is coming...Audi TT, followed by Porsche, then BMW 7 series, then a Lexus SUV (yeh to aise hi gajar muli jaise dikhti hai but still), Merc SL500, Merc CLK, Porsche again, Nissan convertible, BMW convertible, another Porsche, then Cadillac, Nissan Infinity and as a perfect climax, the last car in the virtual eye feast was a Hummer...there must have been around 12-13 of all these cars combined...bloody dont even remember the names now...and all this in a span of 15 mins...on the road...God!!!! And imagine our situation...4 guys..all IIM grads... sitting in a cafe and salivating...too much..all thinking...(if i put it in blunt hindi)..."kya ukhar liya itna padh ke..itna fite mar ke"....On an optimist note, if the Indian Govt decides to literally zero the duties we just might afford one of the lower priced car among these maybe a Mustang in 15-20 years time but sadly enough on a more realistic note we now that this wont happen.... and then the realization struck us and made us look upward to God and ask... Humare ghar ke neeche (oil ka) kuan kyon nahin hai...?????

Remembering the Hill-Top and moving on….

When you are saddled with a deep sense of nothingness in this Desert country and log on to yahoo to see many juniors all with flag messages talking of happiness and anticipation of the convocation and to top it up you talk to Uddu…there is only one way ur mind can go…back to the Campus..back to Hill top where I have spend two of the most memorable years of my life…Its almost a year hence…we have made the transition from participants to alumni but even to this day you feel so close to it..to the hill..to the buildings..to the incidents…to the people …to the whole damn thing..its so special…even today After passing out of Indore, I have visited the campus just once…and it was such a great feeling..that same mess…paratha..omlette…binge drinking..plastic glasses..hangover…..evening stroll…mashaal…midway…familiar smiling faces…the dogs in front of the mess..everything remains the same. I wasn’t accompanied by any of my friends or batch-mates since I had gone for recruitment but not for a moment did I feel myself alone or without company. That place has given me memories…be it the recurring Zehale-masti + whiskey in front of Babbar’s room in first term or non stop cards at my room in the 2nd year…or Kanod’s/Tarun’s yahoo messages everyday at 8.30 pm “yaar khana sad hai..bahar chale” or all those “machau” things or the inadvertent surrender to slumber in Prof Pani’s classes…the list is really long…all these otherwise petty things come back so strongly to you…and not to forget un-imitable characters- MP Singh, Singla, Pammi Paaji, Mama, Jat, u simply cannot forget them…I mean how many times would u come across people like these… Next month, Singla is getting married…n to tell u, I am really looking forward to being a part of it...not so much for the marriage thing but the fact that junta will be there and it will be unbridled fun…it happened in Shalabh’s wedding…and its going to be the same here again… Steadily as expected most of us are getting into our own personal lives and moving on …things like mails announcing marriage are replacing senseless bakar mails but then that’s the way things are destined to be. All of us will move on in life, think more about jobs, replace some of our pubbing with friends with pubbing with colleagues and new friends..meet fewer times..skip some get together, alumni meets..all these are destined to happen..but then that aint a manifestation of loosening of bond..the feeling of oneness and nostalgia towards the campus and everything attached to it will remain..I bet 10-15 years down the line..when we as usual would be flipping channels and stumble across anything showing a convocation or even more generic a college fun scene..there will be one place our mind will fleet to and that’s the hilltop!!!!

When the music is over……

I am quite a music buff; no not the kind who is a devout fan of one or more of the bands and knows even details like when all he sneezed and when was the last time, he or she wore diapers. I am more of the kind who though has preferences, enjoys anything melodious which comes along, irrespective of the genre or the language. However, of late, whenever I have switched on the television and stopped my channel surfing at one or other of the music channels, here’s what I get to see. Talk of Pareto principle manifesting itself… The Tormentor A constipated look, dry painful eyes, a desperate attempt to genuinely look and sound tormented, surrounded by hot chicks strutting their stuff…very often accompanied by Imran Hashmi..Yes boys…I am talking of the one and only Himesh Reshamiya.. If he were a FMCG commodity, the marketer would have loved his distribution reach and penetration across channels. Gosh!!! Turn on any music or movie channel and inadvertently after a song or two, Bingo!! Here comes Mr. Reshamiya..tera suroor..mere huzoor…n god knows what not…he is just there..everywhere..everytime Worst part is that its not the supply side alone that’s tormenting..even from the demand side of it, its equally bad…My waking up time here in Jeddah coincides with the request show Video on Call on B4U (and since that’s the only Indian Channel that comes here, I have to watch it), and you find so many apparently discerning consumers of Indian music requesting stuff like..Shamita can u pls play me this song..that song. And there he is..again and again….No wonder so many times, I prefer to have only my ears being pleased by my limited music collection in the laptop rather than my ears, eyes and mind tormented keeping the TV switched on.. Yo Ingredients: A rapper, a Punjabi (preferably from UK), a DJ (preferably with his hair beaded), neon lights, some words thrown in and men/women doing YO after every half a minute… Result: A Pop song… Trust me guys, it aint an exaggeration. Think of it. Most of the pop stuff u watch on TV aint too different from what is written here…nothing wrong in it…but then how much is the basic problem..If u don’t see the tormentor, u will these bunch. And talk of their band names…God!! I fail to understand if it’s a result of their genuine desire to sound cross cultural or is it a result of a fight between their group members and as a result their inability to agree to a name and hence taking bits n pieces from every faction and just putting it together. BTW even their music aint too different… Screw it bad This is the last and probably the worst of the lot…take a lewd looking girl, undress her as much as u can…throw a bit of more of her likes as side dancers with slightly more clothes...take a topless man…take a good old song, throw in some jarring music..hire a pub for the location and make a remix..Purfect…ah..did I tell good old song..actually let me correct myself a bit..of late, even the new numbers have versions…First of all u have a song…then u will have a remix..then u will have a different band from a different country doing a new remix of that…and some more....so as a result in a span of a month..you would have bore with around 3-4 versions of the song..talk of speed creativity... The worst thing about this category, apart from the overdose of absolutely unaesthetic skin show is the fact that they actually screw up some numbers…Beat this!!! I have even heard a Trance version of Mozart… At this point, I don’t know why but I am reminded of the famous Morrison song…When the music is over……

5......5.......5.....

There are words that remind you of things..people, places, incidents…No rocket science in mapping or stuff like that, but its just that cause of one reason or the other, certain words come with very strong association, like the one we have seen over here…Words we couldn’t even think, back home would mean something, inadvertently result in changing our countenance when uttered in this desert land… 5…. 5… 5… Sitting in a secluded room (even with 2 A/c’s) with asbestos sheet roofing and a workshop below is very painful. On that imagine suddenly, in the middle of work, the speaker phone blasts…5….5….5….Line no…XYZ…..5…5….5…..and we were like what the hell is that….never mind, could be anything…However, our curiosity grew when it started recurring very often…the same words…5…5….5…We couldn’t help it once and asked the admin guy here….n imagine what it came out to be….the guy actually shouts…Fire…..Fire….Fire….God damn it…how come there is a fire every now and then…and the best part was some days back, when he actually screamed..Fire…..Fire….Fire….I DON’T KNOW WHERE IS FIRE…. Khallas… Every thing in this desert land goes khallas…to people..to money…to characters…to incidents…to opportunites…to fear….just like the way back home, where everything can be prefixed by the word Sexy…here the same applies to Khallas…any context….any adjective…everything goes Khallas… Right from the steward saying…the chicken is khallas (which could mean either the bird flu…or the use of genetically modified chicken by KFC or the fact that chicken is sold out….) or the CEO saying…the project is khallas..(which could mean anything depending on his mood) or the driver saying…the sun is khallas…(which could mean that either evening has descended or that summers have ended)….so that’s Khallas for you ….meaning anything and everything…… Head Bath.. I won’t delve deep into it but for me its quite a learning enhancement to know that Head bath actually refers to rinsing your hair..!!!! Yo Babies… This is not from Saudi Land…rather this has emerged as a reason of my being friends with 2 singhs…Pranav Singh and Kulbir Singh…the first Singh has to use Yo in every thing just like the second Singh has to use Babies..and here I am…starting to use Yo Babies..as an answer in affirmation to any question being asked and regarding some of my colleagues, being consultants by profession, they cant help but adopt best practices…the result….Its Yo Babies for lunch being over, to will you come for a stroll…to did you get the data… Thank God..I just managed to refrain myself from uttering Yo Babies when the client asked me …is the project going good???

Blockbuster dialogues in Saudi Land...

This place, Saudi Arabia, houses a lot of communities and one common thing that binds them together, is their ability to deliver blockbuster dialogues at the drop of a hat...u have the lebanese/egyptians etc orating the simplest of lines in the most elegant of manners, the south asians (indians/pakistanis) just not letting their MC, BC go away and the Fillipinos with their cocky sense of homour...its really interesting...Here without going into the names, I will just try to make an attempt to replicate them....obviously i cant bring the expressions and the juices but then my friend, use ur imagination..... (the context is given in italics) Egyptian/Lebanese... (when asked how organized or disciplined wholesalers are in this part of the world) "My boy....i have to count my fingers everytime after shaking hands with them".... (when asked about the ethical level of workers here) "Ask them the price of their mother" (when asked how much subordinates fear the bosses) " Whenever they make a mistake, u know whats the first thing they do....oil their groins...n when they come, they exhibit it to me...cause they know i will slap it hard..very hard...n if i have problems finding it, i will slap it even more" Hows that!!! Indians/Pakistanis In this section, i will just narrate one dialogue which was delivered by a very senior person, explaining why so many companies are having declining profitability and hence the need of consultants...please read it in proper Jat style " Yaar dekho, hum log yahan aaye the sale suit pahan ke...par hum hai bade hi dildar...ek ek kar ke humne apne sare kapde logon ko de diye aur b@#^@%^@ nange hote chale gaye..pahle coat gaya...phir shirt gayi ..phir pant...ab dekho ji..sirf yeh chadhi bach gayi hai...ab humne socha isse pehle ki humari maa c%#@ jaye aur hum total nange ho jaye...bahar waloon ko bula lo...to yeh aapka kaam hai...humari is fati hui chadhi pe..thoda kapda dal ki jayen..nahin to L%$# lag jayenage humare aur hum beech chaurahe pe total nage ho jayenge...." Talk of carrying soil in ur boots!!!! Fillipinos They dont give blockbuster dialogues like the previous two but they got this uncanny ability to talk of real bizzare things in a very very serious manner..here i wont get into the details but just let u know one of their topics of frequent discussions which will give u enuf idea about their cocky nature... ""Which is better....11 children with one wife....or 1 child with 11 wifes""

Sure shot ways to make your employees run away..

1. Bad Boss: Give a person a nasty boss and trust me, he wont stay for long. I have heard of so many friends of mine, opting for jobs with pay cuts, worse profiles, worse places but the hope of a good boss. I mean, the worst thing one can happen to a person after he slogs himself out is to be confronted by a boss who will first make him feel like a piece of shit, take away all credit or blame him for everything going wrong on Planet Earth and add to that bosses who still have attitudes like Mr. Ford, who view people as nothing more than resources...u know whats going to happen... Ya, one thing here..the bosses i am referring to here, could be ur immediate boss, his boss...anyone in the chain or worse still..the man in the corner office...and if he is bad...God save the place... 2. Bench: This is rather simple..hire a person...give him salary...give him designation...but dont give him work...or even better give him something which is called work but is in essence nothing less than what is known as IM (Intellectual Masturbation). What is really amazing is there are enuf organizations which think that putting people on bench is a way of making the employees happy as they feel that people like money but not working...if only better sense prevailed over them... 3. Piss him off: Unlike in the previous 2 rather defined ways, there is no exhaustive definitions of pissing off people. But among the best ones that i have seen are: mistrust, lack of respect, or simple bugging. Bugging is something very interesting...there are just so many small ways which an organization can do to bug people, most common being what is called in local lingo as "chindipanti". Mock him, question his every rupee spent, ask him before lunch how come he affords a pizza hut every day, make spying people as one of the peons and office boys' responsibility...simple...straightforward tools but very very effective... 4. Job Profile/Salary: Now this is interesting. When we are in campus, these are the two most important things we gun for. While these still remain extremely important, i personally feel they are filters people use when selecting a job, not so much when leaving a company. Sure, if the job profile or the salary is bad, people will quit..I mean, you can neither be casual about your career nor be content taking peanuts but since a lot of fundas regarding job profile n all become clear once you are in the market and also since companies in similar strata by and large keep the salaries aligned money aint really too much of a factor, unless lets say the difference is huge...

Airport Drama....

That was one of those very few nights when i didnt mind being hit by a bout of insomnia. Lying in the bed...tossing here and there, i am sure even my countenance bore a big grin knowing that i'l be flying back to India the following afternoon and needless to say, absolutely unaware of the drama which was waiting to be unfolded at the airport.. I arrived at the Jeddah airport, completed all my formalities and was waiting at the immigration counter for the final exit stamp on my visa when lightening struck...the immigration guy took my passport..keyed in something in the comp and blip blip the lights turned red...he looked at me...rather scanned me with a look which i must say wasnt the most comforting, n then came the words....there is some problem..go to the police counter....pointing towards a series of glass chambers. I was like...damn..what could be the matter. Neways, i mustered enuf courage to walk in the pointed direction, remembering all gods and goddesses that to my knowledge and as per stories recited to us in childhood rescued harmless and good people when in pain/danger... The scene in the police cell was no comforting either and the presence of a group of abaya clad women standing there surrounded by police apparently interrogating them for some fault only meant that my turmoil was to last longer. So I kept on waiting with increased heart beat and palpitation. At this point, I looked across towards the duty free counter only to find my colleague being warded off by the police..God what will happen to me!!!! Then came my turn..i walked inside..somehow managed to bring a smile on my face and handed over all my documents to the police. He looked at me, checked the documents, gave me a very dirty look and screamed. ..VISA EXPIRED….U HAVE OVERSTAYED I was like…HOLY SHIT.…I was about to utter the F word but sanity prevailed and ensured that I didn’t commit one more crime in this foreign soil…I looked at him with a blank face..something akin to the face of a hindi movie actor on knowing that his sister has been killed by the villain. The next few minutes passed in a dizzy..i was visualizing how the detention centre would be..how the lashes would be…how would I recuperate from the wounds…what food would be there in the police cell…what other torture ways would they apply…etc etc…. He called up a few senior police on phone, asked me something in arabic which I couldn’t make a word off and then said…200 Riyals..Give me the money…. Trust me, never have I felt better on being demanded money…something in me told that since he is asking for the money, jail wasn’t on the scene..I opened my wallet to give him the amount but was asked to purchase revenue stamps n give..God what was this! How on earth was I supposed to get revenue stamp here…Nevertheless, my belief that good people exist in all parts of the world came true when an African came forward to escort me to the bank to collect them. Being present in an airport without a passport and boarding pass wasn’t too comforting but the fact that I still had the ticket with me was some solace. But it wasn’t over yet. On my way, I was confronted by the airlines people who then seized my tickets as well..and I was given an ultimatum.finish the formalities on 15 minutes or your luggage gets deplaned…Now this was agony..this was totally jale pe namak..but there was little I could do about it…the fact that the Air India guy actually spoke in Hindi didn’t help at all..much to my discomfort. Anyways, courtesy the African, the bank notes thing got done and we actually managed to come back in the counter to collect the ticket and finish the formalities, which took another half an hour or so..it was painful, really painful but nothing compared to first part..Thank God!!! I aint going to the jail…In the end I actually gathered the courage to ask the officer that how come there is a problem since in English its written validity 1 month and its been only 3 weeks..to which he pointed at my something in Arabic which apparently meant to stay for only 2 weeks. Obviously I didn’t have the balls to ask him what’s the reason for this anomaly. By the end of the one hour drama I was like totally drained and virtually gone blank. Spending an hour with police that also in a country like Saudi for a crime as serious as overstay aint a matter of joke. However, all’s well that ends well. And did I tell you that when I had the first sip of beer in flight after a month of hiatus and also after this incident, it was like elixir. The air hostess brought the tray table near me and asked, “Sir what about you?” and trust me, I was about to say, “Yaar kuch bhi pila do..bas tum pila do” but the turn of events in the last 3-4 hours made me measure each word before speaking. So I asked for beer and I actually kept it infront of my eyes and stared at it for sometime…a look typical of hindi movies when the hero meets his beloved after a long time…runs towards her but stops just short..stares at her with stars in his eyes before embracing her…it was exactly the same… I had just the same stars in my eyes…

The Reins of Life

"The fault dear Brutus is not in our Stars but in ourselves....." Something like this was coined by Shakespeare in his Julius Ceaser. Was it ignorance, stupidity or a sheer inflated opinion of a person's ability to control himself and the events around him that made him say so??. I definitely dont mean to say a man should leave everything to lady luck and attribute/blame everything to her but assuming the opposite to be correct is equally wrong. The turn of events of late have made me sit back and think..why is my life writhing in shit and what can i do to ameliorate the situation. The answers did come back to me but none of them comforting...There is no conceivable logical reason why i m going thru what i am and also there is little i can do but wait and watch. So Mr. Shakespeare whats ur take on this??? I guess, there are phases in everyone's life when instances or rather a series of instances happen; that make him believe in something supreme, something more cosmic and divine that controls atleast a significant part of our lives. Desperate as it may appear, there is a little we can do in that, except maybe wait and watch and hope that things turn for the better. At this juncture i consider it important to consider the other side of the spectrum as well. Why dont we ever get so melancholy or thoughtful when something good happens or when the going is unexpectedly good. So selfish...aint we? But ya, the way things have been of late, i seriously feel that people are nothing more than one of the members of a harem of a Sheikh who when he feels treats her royally and when he feels does ..well... what he feel likes, irrespective of how painful/replusive it might be for her. She feels the joy, she feels the pain..but there is little of it that can be attributed to her action and even worse there is little that she can do about it. However, there is solace when i look at two basic facts of life...... 1. there are no foreign events...there are only foreign players: hence what i am going thru, many have gone thru as well. and since they have come out of it and where mortals like i am, i dont see a reason, why i cant come off it. 2. every night, good or bad, has a morning waiting for it...hence there will be light...the lenght of darkness may vary but light is inevitable... So dear soul, relax...soon the law of averages will catch up and the trough will be over....till then, well, wait and watch and dont bother about what Mr. Shakespeare said

Mumbai....Spanning the spectrum

Let me start with a caveat...I have no particular interest in Mumbai. Its just that i was studying it as part of one project and now it seems to be one of the most diverse and heterogenous thing on Planet Earth. I was simply amazed. Take for example...South Mumbai or Town as people would like to call it as. Out of the 3.3 million odd people residing here, barely 0.25 have decent housing facilities and mind you, the parameters of decent housing do not include things like Antique furniture, a jacuzzi or stuff like that. Decent housing just means-anything which is not slums and neither dilapidated. Imagine just 0.25 million which is just approx 55000 housholds. Damn it, u say..but hold on...i aint finished yet... Mumbai is strange.....take a look around...a more probing, inquisitive look and beyond a beautiful facade or two you will find stretches and stretches of slums. What...did you say you dont spot them....could be possible...oh yes! i forgot to tell you that there are also thousands of buildings which are in dilapidated states (housing close to 2 Mn people), build ages ago, whose owners have given up the right to ownership and possession and a significant portion of them are actually hazardous... Aint we talking of the same Mumbai, where riches abound...where irrespective of how high we go, there are always dozens and dozens of rungs above us with innumerable people thereon....Just imagine...Next...one thing to ask for is whats in store for the City in future. My personal opinion is that though the potential to grow is immense, the pace of development will be at snail speed; why??? let me explain.. Lets begin with the basic question...Why is the city in the state, in which it is?There are 2 very basic reasons: 1. The inability of the city to expand either westwards or southwards and also pretty limited growth eastwards. 2. Mill and Slum lands Since the first part is something about which practically little can be done, lets focus on the second one..Looking deeper at the second issue, I now enumerate the basic stakeholders in the mills and slum lands and understand why they aint really gung-ho abt the whole thing. 1. Residents of those mills/slums: They wont give in easily to moving out....Its very simple...moving out is certain...but as far as moving back in is concerned, when and where and whether you will relocated at all is always something in future and hence intrinsically uncertain. 2. Government: Given that the % of ppl in these places is very large, do you think that any government (esp when they are so populist of late), will ever tinker with them, let alone force them to move out and ensure at the same time proper rehabilitation package. 3. Builders: The obscene property prices in Mumbai is nothing but a demand supply mismatch. Why on earth will any builder ever bridge the gap significantly and that at a fast pace. Gradually yes...at long as it does make the prices south bound... So, thats my take on the whole issue. I am sure there are man people who will differ with me, but as they say, its just my opinion. Take it or leave it... Cheers (Views expressed are personal in nature)

Of Insanity and Geniuses

Lemme start with a very basic question: what unites Jim Morrison, Richard Branson, Socrates and Syd Barrett....they r all grt people yeah...but more than that they are all damn ecentric ones...eccentric to the level that if we try to emulate them, we might over and above been labeled nerds/weirdos might be shun off our social circles... So, didnt they face this porblem...this fear of falling on the other side of the thin boundary between insanity and geniuses....i guess they didnt...they were just what they were without fearing the repercussions of failing or thinking too much about what others have to say/think abt them...n thats what makes them great...the believe in themselves...n the absence of a stupid risk reward matrix in their lives.. We, people like you and me...maybe good but we are too constrained in our minds and actions by what society thinks of us..what society wants us to do and worse, what as per society are the parameters of success and accepted behaviour....n mind you society also includes people whom we love, who are close to us and whom we value...n i personally think this kills some latent competency/greatness in us. I personally believe that every person in this earth can do one thing better than anyone else...the trick only lies in unearthing that one thing...but then what if that one thing is not in the ambit of acceptibility...forget it and join the herd.... i have seen many kids being brilliant in one thing or the other...be it sports, theatres, music, etc etc...but many parents, put this activities in the realms of extra-curriculars and hence being thought of as intrinsically instrumental in digressing a child's thought from what he is supposed to do...STUDY....crazy man..how come every child on earth is supposed to excel in one single thing...study this brings me to my first point...insanity...there have been men...lots of them who have shunned this societal boundaries and have done great..true many have failed as well...but as a ratio, the fraction of thought insane but later genius in the universe of insane people is much more than the fraction of all geniueses in the large universe comprising all we apparently normal people.. So... u r disheartened....well, I am for sure!!!!

Yo Man..cool music!!!!

Its not as if I am an expert in music or human behaviour....as a matter of fact i dont think i am an expert at any thing but being a consultant by profession, i can take the liberty to voice my opinion I have organized a couple of parties, wether it be a full fledged party like the one i did in Iris-2004 or a more apparently suede focussed event like the Rock Nite at IIM Indore or the more recurring and less demanding parties at my room in the hostel and now at my apartment...and the behaviour of ppl is really hilarious and interesting...to say the least.. I have seen so many ppl who speak something like this.. Hey Dude, did u check out the way Morrison fell on the floor while performing Break on to the other side.....Damn!! it was so neat.....or stuff like... Yuck!!! How can u listen to Kajra re...its so lewd.... And u can check out.....Break on to the other side would be the only number from Doors they wld have listened and when they are alone, they are the first one to ogle at Aishwarya doing what she does to send mankind's libido soaring!!!! And its even stranger when ppl are with strangers, collegues, women or bosses...Courtesy their half backed knowledge or their pretence of expertise which steams from 10 mins of googling or one session with someone really knowledgeable, they will blurt out lines after lines..especially on issues like...lyrics of a particular song...how someone died or lived...the background in which a particular song was composed or even better..some different version of the song which they would have heard and assume they are the only one....God!!!! things ppl do to impress others.I know a particular guy who once told me.. Yaar its simple...if the other guy is knowledgable and if i dont sound like this, he will think...This guy got no taste...and if the guy is actually tasteless and if i speak a line or two about Music..he'll think...Wow, what a taste.........Talk of Justification... I really love Toto's in Bandra and sitting there, its so amazing there to see people start jumping (trust me...a look at them and u r convinced that we indeed are descendents of apes) the moment a new song starts and blurting typical lines like...Wow!!! i luv this song....Nice DJ ... and quoting one of the few remotely resembling songs they would have ever heard only to find out the song is indeed a different one...and then comes the defence...Damn!! How could i not recognise this....Shit...this is blashphemy...This alcohol na, its bad... Its really hillarious..... Anyway...i m going now to listen to one of my fav...Bappi Lahiri!!!..

Unforgettable moments...

Just felt like pinning down some of the most memorable moments in my life. I will come straight to the point without too much hue and cry. Here i am just including some moments... Moments that have made me feel damn good

They are not listed in any particular order...

Amit, Atul & Bhartiya in Lilavati Hospital...(no..he was not admitted..it was me)

Gopi (Seagram VP HR) doing what he did to get my refund.

Ankur's Dad throwing a party for me on clearing my CA exams and there when quizzed by one of his relatives about it...saying," Nahin bhaisaab...chintu ko to pass hue kafi din ho gaye, yeh to sandeep ki party hai"

Amit's Mom reaction on hearing my CA results and when i reach there, Uncle rushing to fetch lots of sweets and restaurant food, "aaj ghar ka khana thode hi na khta hai"

I screaming on Richa on phone and then she telling,"Good that u shouted so much...atleast now, u must be feeling better"

Gopi again...when i send him a mail stating that i have put his name as reference for HLL summers, replying.."will speak good words abt u..promise"

Moments that have made me belief in myself, professionally

Unfortunately, most..rather all of them are from Seagram...surprising na, that 13 months of your life has done so much good ...

Discussion with Raj at Hot Breads, one autumn aftenoon, where he disclosed the news of moving to HO and when i was jittery..being replied,"If i can put all my credibility at risk by sending you to a bloody demanding job, why dont u have the balls to just accept it." (for this profile, they were looking at someone much senior to me)

Mohit to Guilluame on a teleconference..."Guillaume...if i aint at office and you require any information..just ask for Sandeep"...and there were many seniors sitting there as well..(Guilluame was btw one of the very senior guys at the global finance team.)

Mohit again..." How the hell did u manage to fix that"...on being able to reconcile a Brand Statement by gazing at it for 2 mins.

Param at the South Asia Conference saying something which meant that people like me and one more guy (forgetting his name) shouldnt leave...they are real investments for the company.

So, thats abt it....

Of sex and fuck....

If you are wondering, why of all damn things on Earth, am I writing on the difference between Sex and Fuck, well the answer is simple....this topic sprung up in one of our typical discussions when we had nothing to do and were quite bored...and it quite interested me... So, thats how it started..now let me attempt to differentiate between the two. Grammatical: Sex is a verb or a noun depending on the usage: Verb: Lets have sex Noun: What's ur sex? On the other hand, fuck can be a noun, verb, adjective and adverb as well...Check this out.. Noun: This was the fuck of the century --remember Basic InstinctJ Verb: Fuck it Adjective: She is fucking good Adverb: Damn it. What a fucking fuck? (this actually has an adverb along with a verb) Activity Chain Analysis Imagine a venn diagram of sex and fuck (both in the strict sense). So, as you will visualise in the above diagram, mathematically, fuck is a subset of sex in the strict sense. Hence if we draw an activity chain for sex, we will realise that fuck denotes only one activity during the broader act of sex. Exceptions to above However, even that is not entirely true. In some cases, examples of which you are very much aware of, there is no fuck involved at all. Moreover, if u talk of technical innovations in this area, there is again no fuck involved. While there are technological versions of sex…cyber sex, phone sex……ever heard of cyber fuck..phone fuck?? But over and above this, one of the biggest exceptions happens if we make our analysis gender specific. This venn diagram is applicable only for males…for females, fuck doesn't come into the picture at all. I mean, they don't fuck ..right? Hey..one caveat to this...this is only for the strict dictionary meaning...in metaphorical sense...who can doubt a female's ability to fuck u!!!! Involvement Levels Carrying forward from above, we can also draw a parallel from management styles and say safely that sex is analogous to "participative management" while fuck is about "top down approach or bottom up approach (depends)" So guys, I'll end here…knowing very well theres much much more to this topic.. Awaiting your addendums!!!!!