Stress

“Life is what happens to you when you are busy making other plans”

This was said by some legendary singer, I think Lennon. And that precisely is life. You make a hell lot of plans, you have stars in your eyes, you dream and then you wake up to find your dreams shattered. In a way dreams are a great thing; they transcend all boundaries of reality and limitations and take you to situations you would want to be in. But dreams are meant to be shattered and with these shattering come stress. Stress can be really painful. Most of us hide it beneath the façade of normalcy but when things get out of hand, it does manifest itself in insomnia, drug/alcohol abuse, inability to handle relationships and at extreme stages, depression.

I think mild depression which is a very pertinent effect of stress exists for a lot of us. How many of us can really boost of a good night long sleep. How many of us can boost of not sinking in the couch/bed immediately after returning from a day at work. How many of us can boost of not wanting a drink to ease us off after a typical day at work. How many of us can boost of being calm and serene inside. How many!!!

Stress need not come from such big issues only. Even in our everyday life, there are so many things that happen to us, that make us really stressed out. For instance, phone lines coming busy, traffic jams, internet not connecting, some mistakes in some presentations before a meeting, car getting delayed etc. It happens, small inconsequential things but they create a lot of stress.

For most of us, however the most important drivers of stress is work- nasty boss, pain in the ass client, non co-operative admin people, office politics, salary, bonuses, incompetent people, tough questions etc, all these bring in real tension at work. And given that most of us spend anything around 60 hours at work; these can really take a toll on you. The problem gets compounded for most of us when we equate our life with our careers, with absolutely no regard to our overall well being and joi-de-vivre. I remember once a doctor told me ,”Remember son, it is very important to switch on and off”. I mean that’s so true but we never realize it and by the time we do, in most of the cases, the harm is already done.

The above stated causes of stress are important but what takes the podium is the stress due to personal problems-seeing your close one wait for death or struggle with deadly diseases, broken relationships, lack of companionship or even worse bad relationships, helplessness etc. These are really sad situations to be in. Among these as well, I think one point that deserves special mention is helplessness, cause it’s so omnipresent in most other cases. I have seen a friend, see his father gradually move into the jaws of death and there was nothing he could do about it; that is helplessness. I have seen myself, desperately try to save a relationship for quite some time but the vibes weren’t just there, there was little I could do. That is helplessness. I don’t think there are many situations worse than that of being helpless. There is a lot you want to do and there is a shit you can do. God save that case. And it happens. Remember the lines from Eric Clapton’s Tears in Heaven….Time can bring you down, time can bend you knees, time can bend your heart, have you begging please…begging please…